maybe "rants" isn't the right word. these are simple thoughts about my life. some may be more colorful than others. some language may be offensive, but it depends on your definition of offensive. consider this your warning ;)

11 February 2014

Photo and Blog a Day Challenge-Day 11/28: Two.

Two. Not a difficult prompt since I live with my wife. But finding something I want to capture in a photo was a little more challenging. Two chairs. Two mini tables. Two bookshelves. Pairs of shoes. Two towels. And then I saw them. Our toothbrushes.
One blue. One pink. Objects so simple and relatively small, but powerful and indicative of what I wanted to say.

One blue. One pink. One for my wife. One for myself.

Of course there are plenty of things that are shared. Things that don't come in pairs.

One refrigerator. One stove. One water pitcher. One dishwasher. One washer. One dryer. One bathroom. One shower. One bedroom. One bed.

One husband. One wife.

And each of us have our own pairs.

Eyes. Ears. Cheeks. Nostrils. Arms. Hands. Legs. Feet.

Feet. Each of us have a pair of feet.

In one couple, there are two individuals.

For each individual, there are two feet.

So although we stand together, we do not always lean. We stand on our own. There are obviously times when I lean on her and she on me, but as long as one of us can stand strong on our own two feet, then we do not both fall. Although we are a unit together, we must not lose our identities and individuality. (Within the word "individuality" is "duality." Interesting.)

I can remember a time, a few times actually, in the Navy, high school, junior high, and even back to elementary school when either myself or someone I know would say that there's a hole in their heart or life and that they "need someone to complete them." Maybe you've thought it yourself, maybe not, but you've probably heard it somewhere. Perhaps in a movie where someone's crying in the rain saying that they can't think of life without the other. Or where someone returns from a self-inflicted absence saying they were not whole when they were away from the other.

I love love as much as the next open soul, but we need to cut that shit out.

Love yourself before you can love another. Learn to love openly before you love exclusively. Love without boundaries. Love your life that you make for yourself. Love yourself that you make for yourself.

Love yourself.

Because if you don't, love from another is almost a waste of time. Yours and theirs. Not saying they still won't, but you're simply cheating yourself of what the love really could be.

Love yourself.

Two is better than one, but to have two, you need two ones.

So become one before you can become one.

Be one in love with yourself before you can become one with someone else.

It's easy to feel appreciated by other people. It's easily recognizable when others praise you and compliment you. But how often do you do that with yourself? How often do you praise yourself? How often do you compliment yourself?

How often do you love yourself?

Don't confuse someone loving you with loving yourself. And it's horribly easy to mix up. When someone is giving you all their time, praising you, caring for you, honoring you, appreciating you, it's like you don't even have to do any work to feel good about yourself. But when it's gone. Or even when it disappears for a few minutes, you can feel it. And you become addicted because you've created a dependency for yourself. The need to feel loved by others.

Depending on who you are, feeling loved or appreciated by others can be easy to find. But the more you blind yourself with the "happiness" you think you're living in because of the compliments and free drinks and jewelry and shopping trips, the more it'll crush you when it isn't there.

Now take this out of love relationships context.

Friendships. Family relationships. Professional relationships. Any type of relationship where you interact with another person. It still applies.

Love yourself.

Loving yourself allows you to be a better friend. A better son or daughter. A better husband, wife, sister, brother, uncle, or aunt. A better leader. A better follower.

Love yourself and you release yourself of the addiction for validation, praise, and attention. Love yourself and you will see more clearly. The tasks at hand. The people around you. The things you really should be focusing on. Your safety. Your family. Your advancement.

Love yourself so there can be two.

Two ones in a pair.
Two feet on the ground.

Two sides of the brain and two hands to type collaborated to create the words that two eyes will read these words as one.


And by the way, the pink one is mine.

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